Gratitude Heals

Read More

Scarcity creeps in and grabs a hold with force. What may have been something that we are completely grateful for can turn into our greatest frustration. How does this happen?

Expectations — they create disappointment and rob the joy out of something that has the possibility to create excitement.

When frustration takes over, we start to notice all the things that could and have gone wrong. In fact, the more we focus on what could go wrong, we change the energy around the entire situation and actually attract negativity to the situation.

This is where scarcity takes over. It sees the perfect opportunity to sweep in and make a nice home inside the negative thoughts and emotions causing them to be augmented. Thoughts of not being enough, doing enough, having enough seep in and before we know it, we regret the thing that we wanted so badly.

This has happened to me several times. I place such high expectations on the things I want the most that I end up sabotaging their success. I have done this in relationships, at work, with family and even with working out. My perfectionist tendencies flare up and I get attached to outcomes that I deem are necessary for success and then POOF! it falls apart.

It took me some time to come to this realization. In the meantime, I would be a basketcase wondering “Why?!” “How did this happen once again?” and placing blame everywhere I could until I realized that I had control over the way I perceived each situation and the expectations I set.

It is hard to let go of expectations. We want what we want when we want it. Best laid plans are just that, plans. Nothing is set in stone and so many things can happen that are out of our control. When we decide that things need to be a certain way and leave little room for variety, we set ourselves up for disappointment.

But there is a way to replace scarcity with abundance. It takes some work, but with practice we can change the way we react and replace with positive feelings and reactions.

Release the expectation, attachment and need for control. Be fluid and allow things to occur as they will.

Reframe the negative thought or feeling with something positive. Ask yourself: What is going right?

Recognize what is going right with gratitude. The best way to go from scarcity to abundance is gratitude. Always look for the positive and be grateful. This tiny step will change your mind.

Since we are in the season of gratitude, it is a great opportunity to notice where scarcity has created frustration in your life and take the time to heal this wound. Our bodies have a physical response to this emotion. In terms of our chakras, the first chakra, our root, is the place where we crave security and fulfillment. When we are off balance in this area, we feel fearful, scarce and controlling.

This energy center is located at the base of the spine and when we are out of balance, not only do we emotionally feel pain, but our bodies will respond as well. We can hold the negative feelings and scarce thoughts in our lower backs, legs and feet. But we can heal with gratitude. Transforming the energy frees up the tension that we hold physically and emotionally.

Here are a couple exercises to help transform the negative energy and invite positive and grateful energy in:

  1. Stand with your feet hip distance apart and feel yourself grounding into the Earth. Hold your arms by your side, palms facing outward. Close your eyes and release any tension through your feet into the Earth and through your hands. “I release what no longer serves me and offer gratitude for the blessings that are in my life and trust that all my needs are being met.”
  2. Sit down with your back straight and feet on the ground. Close your eyes and focus on your breath. Take big breaths from your diaphragm, extending your belly. Count to ten (1 -breath in, 2 – breath out…). Repeat until you feel the energy dissipate and find yourself in the present moment. Offer gratitude for your lungs, your breath, oxygen…
  3. Think about a time when you felt immense gratitude. Take a moment to feel that sensation throughout your body. Root yourself into this emotion and know that you always have access to this beautiful feeling and bring yourself back to it when scarcity takes over.

By creating the sensation of being grounded and present we can release the anxiety and fear that surrounds the situation. Trust that all your needs are always provided for. Find a way to reframe the negative thoughts and invite abundance. Bring yourself into the present moment and recognize that your fears are based on a projection into the future and distract you from right here, right now.

Gratitude can heal where scarcity once scarred.

Flow

Read More

I recently traveled to Utah with my boyfriend for a quick weekend getaway. Days prior to the trip, I was laid off from a job that I used to help supplement income. Despite my efforts, it felt like a constant struggle and my soul was not at peace. I tried my best and remembered a lesson my dad taught me “Always do your best and keep your integrity intact.”

I created a deadline to leave in a month if the energy didn’t shift into alignment. Two days after I set that goal, I was called into an office and laid off. I was grateful for my renewed freedom, but disappointed with the way it ended. Although I did not see it coming, I offered gratitude for the manifestation blessing.

So, there I was in Utah about to embark on a hike. As we stepped onto the trail, we were welcomed by a rushing river tumbling through the valley. It was breathtaking. It had been a while since I had seen a river so swollen and rushing. The sound was meditative and never ending, staying with us until we made our way high enough to where the path became snow.

The snow was a surprise as we trudged our way through ankle deep snow trying to reach a lake that we were told was magnificent. Now, I am not a fan of being cold, let alone hiking through snow in summer clothes. But, I knew that I needed to keep going. I complained to my boyfriend who seemed unfazed by the new terrain. He encouraged me as I made my way up the icy hill.

After what seemed like forever, we made it to the lake. It was surrounded by snow and was frozen solid. I had a bit of disappointment because my expectation was a lake surrounded by a meadow filled with wildflowers. I sat down on a rock and meditated. I released my expectations. I released my fatigue. I released being cold. I sat there in the sun for 20 minutes with my eyes closed, just breathing in and out.

Off in the distance, I could hear a rock falling from up high. I was amazed at the silence of the scenery and the ability to hear a rock falling. The frozen scene created the stillness to be present. I felt at peace.

When I opened my eyes, I saw the lake through a different lens. It was absolutely beautiful. The mountains that surrounded us seemed to provide an expansive nature making me feel so small, yet very powerful. I made it all the way to 9000′ where the sun had not melted a lake yet. I breathed in gratitude for the newfound appreciation and smiled.

I raised my vibration at a higher elevation.

As we made our way back down, I felt renewed and accomplished. Halfway down, the river started rushing as the ground went from snow to mud to dirt once more. The river once again serenaded our hike and I realized that I needed to welcome flow back into my life.

I recognized for my life to flow freely, I had to let myself melt like the snow.

The rigid constraints that I had made to create security and certainty were blocking flow from occurring. I was in my own way. When I take things into my own hands with control, it never really works. I was pushed out of something that wasn’t allowing flow to continue into my life. I noticed what a tight grip I tried to maintain once again.

From experience, I know that the things I hold tight to are the ones that slip away. In this case, it was security and certainty.

The following week, I approached my business with a new-found focus and intention. I realized that when I let go and allow flow to happen, everything falls into place and it is — effortlessly and beautifully. The resistance and pressure I had created blocked the positive energy that was trying to flow into my life.

I was not expecting such a lesson from a river in the middle of the Utah wilderness. But I am so grateful for the raging river and frozen lake that taught me to change my perspective and release expectations in order to allow flow to occur.

Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them – that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.  – Lao Tzu

Full Flower Moon

Read More

I was 33 years old and terrified that I was leaving a career that was my dream 5 years previous. I wanted to work in the wine industry and learn everything I could about it. This job took me all over the world where I met amazing people and experienced culture and cuisine. For a wanderluster with a palate for pinot, this was a dream come true.

I was so grateful and in awe of all the opportunities BUT something just wasn’t right.

Deep down, I was miserable. I wanted to travel on my own terms and write. I knew that writing wasn’t going to pay the bills, but I knew I had to try it. This concept was terrifying. I had created such security and my soul was begging me to leap. I edged up to the cliff, looked down and went right back to work several times.

I decided to take 2 years off and calculated my freedom number; the amount needed to sustain my simplified lifestyle for my temporary hiatus from work. I saved until I had what I thought was enough to support myself. Then, I stepped back to the edge of that cliff and I still felt my knees tremble, unable to leap.

My soul was relentless and the misery transcended anything amazing that was happening. There were promotions, trips and raises but my resistance caused more pain and left me feeling helpless and depressed.

Then, I realized no matter how many times I crunched numbers or made excuses, this calling was going to pursue me until I let go of the security and resistance and opened to the unknown.

The day I quit my job, I was nervous and excited. I had prepared a letter and walked into the office of the company president. This man was responsible for all the great things that I experienced with the company as well as mentoring me along the way. I was sad to deliver this message to him. As we spoke, he was gracious and understanding. I was so grateful. That moment solidified that I was making the right decision.

Immediately following that conversation, I felt the resistance fade and relief took over. I felt light and happy and excited to embark into the unknown.

Suddenly, I had the freedom I had so badly craved but felt fear creeping back in.

I knew that if I didn’t squash the thoughts of scarcity and insecurity, I would not be able to enjoy what had happened. I combated the fear with gratitude. I sat in the feeling of relief and thanked God for helping me — prodding me — pushing me to harness my bravery.

This was a lesson in becoming. When resistance, fear and pride took over, I was not allowing myself the chance to blossom. I remained tightly closed for almost 2 years because I feared the loss of security. I needed to let go of certainty in order to fully open up to the beauty that wanted to unfold.

It wasn’t until I full released my grasp on the need to control and my craving for certainty that I was able to truly appreciate what was transpiring. When I let go, I felt my creative passion explode and writing became something I must do. I celebrated my bravery and embraced uncertainty like an adventure to a new land. My heart and soul opened and blossomed.

Tonight’s Full Flower Moon is the perfect opportunity to notice where abundance and gratitude are taking place in your life and confront and fear that may be holding you back. Address limiting beliefs and affirm your greatness. This is a time to showcase the beauty that has been carefully worked on and celebrate the growth that has occurred.

Open the floodgates of passion and infuse the areas of your life that have grown stale from neglect. Go after what you really want. Open up and bloom right where you are. Remember a time when you felt alive and excited and then ask yourself: “How can I bring that energy back into my life?”

Now is not the time to play small. Let go of anything holding you back. Celebrate all the goodness that is flowing into your life. Offer gratitude for the fruits of your hard work. This is the time to show off your big beautiful blooms and appreciate their glory.

It has been 3 years since I delivered that letter and I appreciate what took root that day and celebrate all that has blossomed since then.

“The day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”  -Anais Nin

Giving Thanks

Read More

This is my favorite time of year. I love the collective attention on giving thanks. For several years, practicing gratitude has been a daily habit and I have noticed changes in my outlook, overflowing blessings and a more open heart from this practice.

It is amazing how the simple act of saying or writing “I am grateful for…” can create a shift in perspective. Ever since I started this practice, I notice the smallest things like a tiny flower blooming in the weeds because my mind is calibrated to see the good.

Practicing gratitude does not take extra time. In fact, you can do it as you pour your morning tea, on your commute, during lunch and my favorite, right before bed. As you end your day, reflect on the day’s activities and think of at least 3 things that you are grateful for, every day.

I was reviewing my gratitude journal during a particularly rough day. As I read the pages, my thoughts of scarcity and defeat transformed into abundance and victory. I was reminded of all the greatness that had occurred and felt immense gratitude and joy from the exercise. It is difficult to maintain a negative mindset when you remind yourself of all the things you are grateful for.

Spend some time this week offering thanks to the universe for the opportunities it has provided and to the people who have made an impact on your life. Then, create a daily practice which can change your mind, body and soul. Positive thoughts have a higher vibrational frequency and will attract like into our lives. When our output is grateful, it is amazing how more things to be grateful for occur.

Giving thanks can also raise the vibrations that have been lowered due to recent events. Will you do your part to raise the planet’s vibration and offer gratitude today?

Here is a free download to help you get started on your gratitude practice: Gratitude Sheet

Confidence: Interviews, Negotiations & Communications

Read More



One of the topics that consistently comes up in coaching is finding the confidence for a job interview, salary negotiation and in personal affairs. Asserting oneself can feel uneasy because we don’t want to rock the boat. We end up stepping aside for someone else to shine and get that job or risk not getting what we really want.

Confidence comes with clarity. When we can clearly define what we want, we can visualize the outcome and communicate with confidence. Clarity is the super power when it comes to negotiations and communication. A well thought out argument is more likely to be listened to. When we can paint a clear picture or scenario of what and why we want something, we can get the point across with ease.

I remember when I wanted to negotiate my salary and felt fear and doubt rising inside of me, thwarting my confidence and telling me several excuses as to why it would not happen. I chose to sit in that painful place for a moment, but knew that I was the only one that could be my own champion. I went back and forth on approaching my boss and after careful planning, I took the leap and approached him with my proposal.

I had numbers to back up my performance, customer reviews and a number in my head that I wanted. I had done my research on comparable salaries and wanted to feel valued and appreciated. In fact, after all my careful planning, I realized that the underlying reason for my request was because I wanted to feel valued.

This can be said in personal affairs as well. We all want to be seen and heard and most of all valued. Confidence in communication does not need to be paired with arrogance, it is better partnered up with clarity.

When we communicate with confidence, we can be seen as more vibrant, attractive, intelligent and calm.

So how to boost confidence? Here are a few steps to muster courage, grow your confidence quotient and harness your inner bravery:

  1. Make a list of what you want and why. (note: the why is very important)
  2. Ask 10 people what they believe your top 3 qualities/attributes are. Notice any commonalities. (trust me: we sell ourselves short and this is a way to learn how others view us and boost confidence)
  3. Back yourself up with examples, numbers, hard facts, etc… Show them you did your homework and know your stuff!
  4. Visualize and breathe: close your eyes and see yourself negotiating, discussing and receiving. Breathe into this feeling. Find your calm and replace the anxious thoughts with confident thoughts.
  5. Power pose. If you don’t know what I mean, watch Amy Cuddy’s TED talk which has helped many people muster up courage right before the big talks/performances/negotiations.

Whether you are going in for an interview, negotiating a salary or having a hard discussion with a loved one, taking the time to find clarity and confidence will help ease the discomfort. Replace anxiety with anticipatory excitement. You are your own champion and we all want our superheroes to stand tall with confidence. Find yours within and embrace the bravery that lies inside.

For more information on coaching and a free 15 minute consult to customize a coaching package, email me at emily@soulsadventures.com

How the Ocean Reminds Me of Abundance

whaleThe other day, I came home to a notice of my rent being raised. Although this isn’t the best news to receive, I was surprised by my reaction. My immediate thought was that everything is as it should be and everything will be okay. I realized that if I would have received this notice a year ago, I would have reacted negatively and most likely become upset.

Shortly after I receiving the notice,  I laced up my runners and headed to the beach for a much needed run. I was thinking about the notice and processing the fact when all of a sudden, two whale’s tails rose out of the water very close to shore. I stopped, stunned at what I had just witnessed.

I watched the water and their heads bobbed up and then their fins followed by spouts of water bursting every so often. I stood there for a long time watching these magnificent creatures choreographed to the sound of the waves. I was completely entranced.

The longer I stood there, I realized that there were actually four whales close to shore. The only word that came to mind was “Abundance.” I often scan the water in search for whales, seals and dolphins when I am on the beach. I usually see one every once in a while out in the distance. But this time I was being shown just how abundant the universe really is. I considered this a good omen, one of abundance and provision.

Everything is going to be okay. In fact, when I look back on every time I received news like a rent hike, the universe has provided in ways I could not even imagine and I am filled with gratitude.

I am continually reminded of the lesson of going from a mindset of scarcity to sufficiency and finally abundance. Our minds create our reality. If we allow thoughts of scarcity to overtake us, that becomes our reality. Fixing our minds towards abundance and going a step further and actually practicing gratitude for abundance all around attracts abundance into our lives. Simply put, this is the law of attraction.

I am continually amazed how just changing my mindset from scarcity and anxiety to abundance and gratitude changes everything. Letting go and noticing the positive is key. When I just open my eyes to stop and observe, I realize just how abundant life really is.

Is there an area in your life where scarcity takes over your mindset? How can you transform your mindset to abundance? Where do you see abundance in your life?

For more information on transforming your mindset from scarcity to abundance and practicing gratitude, email me at emily@soulsadventures.com.